Sprezzatura: Part I

I feel like I've been working on this post for forever- and really I have, it's been over a month since I started writing about this idea- but it still doesn't feel complete. I'll post what I have now (Part I), then add more once I find the words.

Awhile ago, I read a post on Laini Taylor's blog and where she talked about this idea of sprezzatura, which (besides being a really pretty Italian word- say it! it's like candy) refers to the facade of nonchalance courtiers and courtesans put on during the Renaissance to make everything they did- dancing, sonnet writing, theatrical performances- seem effortless. They'd spend hours practicing and composing only to flaunt their hard-earned skills the next morning as if the new poetry they'd spent hours composing or the dance that they'd mastered was bestowed upon them in the night. Effort was gauche. She went on to write that Pinterest and some of the blogosphere felt very sprezzatura-ish:

"I have this half-formed idea haunting me lately that the internet gives us weird expectations of life. (I know, categorize this idea under D for Duh.) Pinterest, blogs. It's like: beautiful, organized people are flaunting their ... lack of flailing ... in our faces. 

Look at my beautiful home and my artfully presented meal. And now I'm going to show you how perfectly I pack for a weekend getaway to our second home on a Swedish island, built with timber we milled with our own hands. (Scandinavians, I'm looking at you, with your beautiful homes and smiling faces! :-) After I arrange the library by color. "

I agree, some of blogland feels plastic-y perfect, but I don't think that's nearly as toxic as the people we encounter that are studiously careless in their perfection. And it's not so much the perfection that bothers me, but the inauthenticity of that perfection. Going back to the idea of courtesans and courtiers in the Renaissance, the whole idea of sprezzatura seemed to be "be more impressive than your friends, but don't make it seem like you tried." Doesn't that sound toxic to real relationships? I've been thinking about that a lot lately-- how the glorification of busy and a sense of competition at a school, university, or job environment can really impede on making real connections with people. Am I making sense? It seems to me that if you're spending so much time trying to be casually perfect, one-upping each other for the benefit of royalty. It may be a pretty word, but it's not a pretty concept.

And let's be honest, trying to attain effortless perfection sounds, well, exhausting.

x M